The Beethoven Effect

Setting: While walking his dog, Shiro, in the local park, Anonymous overhears the conversation of two other dog owners.


Owner 1: I’m going to do the Beethoven exercises.

Owner 2: Eh, what’s that?

Owner 1: If you listen to 10 minutes of Beethoven a day you get smarter.

Owner 2: That’s amazing. How do you know it works?

Owner 1: Scientific research. Listen to 10 minutes and your IQ goes up eight points.

Owner 2: Beethoven, you say? Any Beethoven?

Anonymous (aka Owner Ο), interjecting: Mozart!


Owner 1: ‘scuse me?

Anonymous: It’s Mozart, not Beethoven. The research was about what happened to IQ after listening to 10 minutes of Mozart’s sonata for two pianos in D major.

Owner 1: It’s that particular? It doesn’t work with Beethoven?

Anonymous: It doesn’t work with Beethoven and it doesn’t work with Mozart and it doesn’t work with any other music. That original research has been discredited. No one can replicate it. The German Research Ministry recently examined everything they could find on this and concluded that it doesn’t work.

Owner 1: But it can’t hurt can it? I’m going to try anyway.

Owner 2: Me too. I’m sure it does some good.

Anonymous: Try some Kate Bush. That might work.


Post Script: More on brain training in a future post.

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